That’s Farming’s version of things people do not tell you about dating a farmer.
- Plans revolve around livestock;
- The weather forecast is ‘the Bible’;
- A cow will generally show signs to calve when you are about to head out the door (even though he/she is watching her all week);
- Become familiar with the term ‘cab slag’;
- Herding could be your relationship’s greatest test;
- Forget about date nights during calving, lambing and silage season (the lambing/calving shed or tractor cab it is);
- A holiday involves a day in the bog;
- A cup of tea can solve anything (within reason);
- You will always find bailing twine in their pockets;
- A ‘full’s night sleep’ is more than five hours;
- When you go out for dinner, you must order beef or lamb (forget about those fancy pasta dishes);
- You will become their ‘unofficial’ lambing/calving assistant;
- They spend their time looking at mart sales via MartEye or LSL Auctions or ads on Donedeal when they are on their phone;
- Consider a trip to the mart a date/day trip;
- Unless you become their farming assistant, you may not see them for days;
- If they do not return your call or text immediately, it does not mean they have lost interest.
Dating a farmer
Some information you should know when dating a farmer from UFU:
- Standing in the gap when moving livestock and not falling out with the in-laws;
- Going on a ‘break’ over the harvest/silage period is essential;
- Date night consists of viewing Rare Breed, Farm FLiX, the weather forecast or CCTV footage of the maternity ward;
- Meals in the local livestock market or in the cab of the tractor;
- A unique smelling ‘perfume’;
- They are never on time – especially when it’s lambing/calving time or the slurry ban is lifted;
- Understand all the farmer lingo and acronyms;
- Under every field ‘name’ and back road – “The top field down the side road at Jimmy’s”
- Learn the codes: “The one with the….” Or “the biggest one…”
- Being telepathic is handy;
- Become an expert in keeping farm records.
Have you more to add to the list? Send your suggestions to – [email protected]
